The Best Dad
Years ago I heard a story of a dad named Paul who gave his young son a small chalkboard to practice writing on. One evening his son called out from the bedroom, "Dad, how do you spell best?"
Paul answered him. Moments later, the boy hollered, "How do you spell kid?"
Finally he asked, "How do you spell ever?"
When the boy showed him what he'd written on the chalkboard, Paul expected to see "I'm the best kid ever." Instead, the boy beamed as Paul read the message: "You're the best dad a kid can ever have."
Paul recalled that it was one of the best days of his life. In fact, he had to buy his son another chalkboard because he wanted to save this message forever and hang it on his wall. It's still there.
Feeling appreciated is enormously important to adults as well as children. So much so that we often don't think enough about what we'd most like to be appreciated for.
Being appreciated at work is a big deal. Who doesn't want approval and respect from one's boss and coworkers? Beyond the economic value of raises, promotions, and commendations, praise can be gratifying and motivating. That's why good employers look for opportunities to acknowledge and thank employees for their contributions.
Yet as meaningful as work recognition is, if you could choose between winning your child's "Best Mom/Dad A Kid Can Ever Have" award and being named "Best Employee," which would you choose?
The point is not to belittle the pursuit of approval in your business life but to remind you how much more meaningful it is to know you're important to and appreciated by the people who love and need you the most. Your most important job in life is to be worthy of that appreciation.
Being the "best ever" mom or dad, husband or wife, or friend - it doesn't get any better than that.
Michael Josephson
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The Best Dad - Happy Father's Day
Watch your thoughts; they lead to attitudes
Curing Victimitis
Watch your thoughts; they lead to attitudes.
Watch your attitudes; they lead to words.
Watch your words; they lead to actions.
Watch your actions; they lead to habits.
Watch your habits; they form your character.
Watch your character; it determines your destiny.
These words of unknown origin tell us that our silent and often subconscious choices shape our future. Every aspect of our lives, at home and at work, can be improved if we use our power to think, reflect, and make conscious choices about our thoughts, attitudes, words, actions, and habits.
Instead, many of us think of ourselves as victims. We complain about our circumstances and what others did to us. Whatever psychological comfort there is in feeling powerless and blameless when things aren't going right, in the end, victims lead unsatisfied lives.
We're most vulnerable to victimitis when we're under the influence of powerful emotions like fear, insecurity, anger, frustration, grief, or depression. These feelings are so powerful, we believe our state of mind is inevitable. Our only hope is they will go away on their own. Yet it's during times of emotional tumult that using our power to choose our thoughts and attitudes is most important. We can't make pain go away, but we can refuse to suffer.
Even when we don't like any of our choices, we do have some -- once we realize we can take control. It isn't easy, but what we do and how we choose to feel about ourselves has a profound impact on the quality of our lives. Victims may get sympathy for a while, but that isn't enough.
Taking personal responsibility for our happiness and success can be scary, but the payoff is enormous. Although we can't make our lives perfect, we can make them better -- usually a lot better.
Michael Josephson
www.charactercounts.org
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Gifts From the Heart... Michael Josephson
Gifts From the Heart
According to legend, a young man while roaming the desert came across a spring of delicious crystal-clear water. The water was so sweet he filled his leather canteen so he could bring some back to a tribal elder who had been his teacher. After a four-day journey he presented the water to the old man who took a deep drink, smiled warmly and thanked his student lavishly for the sweet water. The young man returned to his village with a happy heart.
Later, the teacher let another student taste the water. He spat it out, saying it was awful. It apparently had become stale because of the old leather container. The student challenged his teacher: "Master, the water was foul. Why did you pretend to like it?"
The teacher replied, "You only tasted the water. I tasted the gift. The water was simply the container for an act of loving-kindness and nothing could be sweeter. Heartfelt gifts deserve the return gift of gratitude."
I think we understand this lesson best when we receive innocent gifts of love from young children. Whether it's a ceramic tray or a macaroni bracelet, the natural and proper response is appreciation and expressed thankfulness because we love the idea within the gift.
Gratitude doesn't always come naturally. Unfortunately, most children and many adults value only the thing given rather than the feeling embodied in it. We should remind ourselves and teach our children about the beauty and purity of feelings and expressions of gratitude. After all, gifts from the heart are really gifts of the heart.
Michael Josephson
www.charactercounts.org
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Character ... Michael Josephson
~Michael Josephson
Radio Commentator
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Inspirational Story: The Parable Of Brother Leo
The Parable Of Brother Leo
An old legend tells of a French monastery that was well-known throughout Europe because of the extraordinary leadership of a man known only as Brother Leo.
Several monks began a pilgrimage to visit Brother Leo to learn from him. Almost immediately, the monks began to bicker as to who should do various chores. On the third day they met another monk who was also going to the monastery.
This monk never complained or shirked a duty. Whenever the others would fight over a chore, he would gracefully volunteer to do it himself. By the last day, the other monks were following his example, and everyone worked together smoothly.
When they reached the monastery and asked to see Brother Leo, the man who greeted them laughed. "But our brother is among you!" pointing to the fellow who had joined them late in the trip.
Today, many people seek leadership positions not so much for what they can do for others, but for what the position can do for them: status, connections, perks, or future advantages. As a result, they do service primarily as an investment, a way to build an impressive résumé.
The parable about Brother Leo teaches another model of leadership, where leaders are more preoccupied with serving than being followed, with giving than getting, with doing than demanding. It's leadership based on example, not command. It's called servant leadership.
Can you imagine how much better things would be if more politicians, educators, and business executives saw themselves as servant leaders?
Michael Josephson
www.charactercounts.org
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